doing our own thing

one of the things i’m trying hard not to do is compare eli to other babies (younger/older/books/etc). Yes, i want/need advice from friends but i’ve found i can quickly drive myself insane asking “how did you do that?”, “when did he xxx”, “what was your schedule”, “what book did you follow”, and so on. it can be maddening! EVERY baby is 100% different – there is no formula. In fact, there isn’t even and individual formula at this point — just when we think we have something that works, it doesn’t anymore. i’m scared to say with confidence that anything “works”. today it “works”‘for us to bathe him, top him off around 9pm, put him in the swaddle me blanket, blare some enya and let him cry for 10 minutes (which sucks and is so, SO hard). this is our current sleep “formula”. it’s been working but who knows how long it will last. but i’ll take it for the time being — last night he went to bed at 9:30, got up at 3:45 and again at 7. wow! Of course, i couldn’t sleep after the 4am feeding/pump. i ended up playing on pinterest and polishing off the rest of my zucchini brownies. i really need to learn to lay off the middle of night snacks — it’s fine while BF since you need the extra calories for milk production– but it will need cease when i’m finished!

anyway, i keep google and my stack of baby books nearby and talk with my mommy girlfriends all the time, but at the end of the day i try not to get worked up that we’re not on a 3-hour
“schedule” yet with coordinated naps, etc. funny that for the first time in my life i’m actually just taking it a day at a time and tackling things as they come. if that means napping on me in the moby wrap, so be it!

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