indecisive

just like pretty much everything in my life right now, i am tardy at keeping up with my blog posts. i have SO many awesome pictures from christmas. and, i will post them. in time. maybe christmas in july.

i just don’t have the energy right now. eli’s month-long sickness, topped off with 4 days of holiday chaos, topped off with work/laundry/life have pretty much put me in a catatonic state. i cannot even make the simplest of decisions right now. seriously. what detergent to purchase? what to make for dinner? what time to start bath time? it’s daunting. that’s when i know i’m in need on some sort of escape. i’ve reached that point.

the good/bad news…we’re supposed to have that next week. we are supposed to travel to vail for a few days (well, a week for pk, 4 days for me). but i don’t know if it’s going to happen for me. long story short, despite my NEED for some “mer” time, i also am having an equally strong guilt trip about leaving eli for the first time for more than 24 hours. and, being a plane ride away. and, him still being a little under the weather. so, i am about 50/50 as of this hour…earlier tonight i was dead set on going. earlier this afternoon, i was dead set on not going. ugh.

i am trying to convince myself that a few days away will be great. i will go to the spa, take pilates, drink wine. maybe ski (but probably not b/c i’d rather spend my small snippet of “mer” time doing things i really love — not being frustrated about what a bad skier i am). but the other part of me says it’s pointless to spend that kind of money and be miserable/sad. so, i am not sure. i am driving pk nuts talking about it. what i can assure you is that it will be a “game time” decision.

my goal this weekend (while cooped up yet again as eli’s snotty nose doesn’t need to be exposed to the elements nor the flu-like people roaming the streets), is to get my christmas picture post complete (on top of 32 other goals i have for the weekend…two of which might get tackled!).

ok. sorry for the vent session. sometimes you just need it.

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